I drink too much and I am sincerely unhappy. I have had thoughts of suicide often in the past 18 days.
There are no days when I feel happiness.
There are only days when I can successfully feign happiness to others.
My mind is absolutely fucking perfect.
It is my mentality that is garbage.
The only way that I can move forward is to acknowledge my own flaws.
I cannot imagine that this will be an easy, or pleasant, process.
I can only imagine that it is neccessary.
I hope this message finds you well, and I hope that you are in the best of spirits. Someday I will find you, and we can walk hand-in-hand into the autumnal sunset.
Until then I am on my own, and I will do my best to do well without you.
I will always love and miss you.