I'm calling bullshit on this. Trying to pass this off as fact. For most spider species, the female is MUCH larger than the male. In addition pheromones and other things are at play here so that spiders don't "go gay" by accident.
Male spiders have a palpal bulb on their pedipalps. They basically wave their cocks around in front of their faces. So, even species where the male and female look similar, they are easily identifiable.
Bingo. Watch a nature video on how many spiders mate. They basically drum their cocks on the female spider until she's ready to mate.
Watch what the red-back males do while mating....
They generally try not to get eaten.
I've got tons of spiders where I am, everything from huntsmen, nasty fuckers like red backs and white tails, and huge numbers of varieties of jumping spiders, even peacock spiders (which are really pretty, but super tiny).
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