How the hell do you get someone to be better at the timing? That drummer guy that I been jamming with seems to like to increase the tempo of the song as we are playing the song.
Lots of practice with things that require precise timing. We'd spend like 30 to 45 minutes on one song, take a small break, and then do another song. We'd then loop back to the same songs.
What your drummer is doing is called 'racing'. That's pretty easy to fix, at least short term. In time it'll be long-term. Play to a metronome. Get a phone, tablet, or real one that has blinking lights that can be seen from a distance and use that. There's also a click track option, where the drummer plays to a click track. Any drummer refusing to do so should not be a drummer, at least in the studio. It requires confrontation - but you can be perfectly professional about it. Stop the song and point out that he's racing. But, that's when you do the positive - and dig out the metronome or click track.
I keep telling him to stop speeding up but that doesn't seem to be helping
You're gonna need a click track or metronome. I recommend one with a light that you can put up in front of the band so that everyone can see it.
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