Zippers are less degenerate than buttons or string ties.

Ask any arab goat herder. Goats can't hear buttons or drawstrings, but they can hear zippers and have a chance to scatter.

Zippers were a gift from God. That's the only way to explain their pure brilliance. Think about them. How do you start from nothing, and come up with a zipper? It's like nothing on Earth. It shouldn't work, but it does. It's counter-intuitive, like being able to ride a bicycle on only two wheels. You wouldn't think it was possible until you've seen it done, and for that reason you wouldn't think of it or try to build it. All those tiny little bits of metal sewn together with thread on fabric. Yet it doesn't just fall apart the first time you try to use it? It's fucking brilliant! It's like the discovery of the double helix. It's a bolt from heaven itself into the brain of man.