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Neutralizing the Narcissist's Poisonous Tactics

Neutralizing the Poison

True narcissists are easy to deal with because they have a blind spot in their thinking and only a handful of tools they use. When you are their target, it doesn’t seem easy, but that is only because you have fallen into an unfortunate pattern of behavior.

There are a set of rules and tactics you can implement that will gradually rob them of their ability to harm you. You can neutralize their ability to spread poison and you can even turn them to your own agenda without them knowing about it.

Rule No. 1: The first rule in dealing with a true narcissist is implementing no contact as soon as possible.

They are capable of causing harm and you should protect yourself from that harm. You have a right to seek safety and protection. Also, have a “go bag” stashed somewhere with a set of keys, cash enough for a hotel room, a few changes of clothes and a smart phone or tablet that has a texting app that works through WiFi. Being able to walk away from a face to face confrontation is power.

The rest of this is for people who, for whatever reason, are unable to go no contact. Those of us who are trapped there know what that is like. These rules and tactics also apply to people who engage in standard narcissistic behavior, but a normal person’s ability to be reasonable and make compromises and amends means you shouldn’t really have to be hardcore about it.

Rule No. 2: Never, ever, ever mention the word narcissist.

You will polarize this person in a way that will be difficult to return from. If you have done this, already, just let it fade into memory. Also, don’t use "gaslight", “triangulate”, “love bomb” or anything else that might lead back to literature that discusses narcissists.

Rule No. 3: Never, ever, ever try to convince the narcissist they are a narcissist.

In fact, the best diagnosis for them is Borderline Personality Disorder, so that they can be convinced to go through cognitive behavioral therapy. You will usually not convince a true narcissist that they are a narcissist. If they become convinced, it will be because you have utilized these rules and tactics against them so well.

Rule No. 4: Be polite.

Politeness is its own reward and it is your best weapon. The longer you are steadfastly polite, the more a person’s negative overtones become obvious to themselves and the people around them. Never give the appearance of being the hostile party.

Rule No. 4: Ban sarcasm.

This is more difficult than I thought it would be, but it comes naturally, now. Sarcasm is just going to be used against you and make you look like the jerk. Especially in writing. If something can be read either way, specify that it is an honest question.

Rule No 5: Ban secret conversations.

If you are texting, always make sure someone else is in the thread with you. No one on one texting. No coordinating against people in secret and don’t even allow yourself to be in a position where you give the impression you are coordinating with anyone. From now on, you don’t say anything about anyone that you wouldn’t tell them in person. Once you have lived with that, for a bit, then you can start telling people that you don’t participate in secret conversations to coordinate against anyone or put yourself in the position where that might be the case. You can use “court safe”, religion, “my therapy” as a reason, or even not bother to offer an explanation. “As a general rule of thumb, I have banned having secret conversation froms my life.” Once your problem person is aware of this rule, it will put them on the run, because they are going to go immediately have a secret conversation about it.

Rule No. 6: Keep everything “court safe.”

This means that you should expect a judge to look over every email and text message and have secretly recorded conversations. An imaginary judge. This judge is looking for the hostile party. You are allowed to be angry. You are allowed to have your feelings and act upon those feelings. Just don’t show those feelings to anyone who isn’t safe or anyone who doesn’t understand how and why you have to protect yourself.

As far as real recordings, I recommend hunting cameras that are triggered by motion activation and always having a device around, like a smart phone, that is capable of taking pictures, recording sound and recording video. Know your local laws about recording people.

Now that you know the ground rules, here are your three tactics that you should employ in every exchange:

Tactic No. 1: Telegraph the behavior.

You can often predict the problem person’s behavior. Simply by telling them you are concerned they are about to commit that behavior creates a trap for them. You’ll get better at predicting when you practice, but with no alternative you can also just explain past behavior in general terms, so that it doesn’t repeat. Generally, don’t use any jargon. Keep it simple.

“I’m afraid you are using your inheritance as a carrot to make me do things that I don’t want to do.”

“I’m concerned you are having secret conversations that are being used to undermine me.”

“Is there a chance you are going to play the victim card if I spell out some of your hurtful behavior?”

Tactic No. 2: Reverse Triangulate

This merely means you bring as many sets of eyes in against your problem person as possible. This simply means telling your problem person’s “flying monkeys” or “harem” about the behavior without using jargon before the behavior happens so that the credibility of the rumors against you begin to slowly deteriorate.

By including people in the conversations and always being consistently polite, non sarcastic and “above” secret conversations, the extra set of eyes force a person to censor themselves. You can even use imaginary eyes like your “journal” or a psychiatrist that doesn’t exist.

(I have a fake psychiatrist, btw, that I use. This psychiatrist believes in, first, controlling your own reactions to bad behavior and then using truth, honesty and positivity to counteract dishonesty and negativity.)

If you are caught in conversation, often use “Person A says...” and “Person B thinks...” where the problem person is now forced to go through the extra cognitive effort to work around these other people’s points of view. It also allows you not to attach yourself to good ideas so that they will be discredited. Bonus points if you can attach a person you don’t like to an idea you do like while hinting you don’t like the idea.

Tactic No. 3: Seek justification.

Just make this a habit. “I’m confused, can you explain that?” “I understand you are upset, but I don’t understand why?”

When ancient history gets drudged up, use, “I know, that was a long time ago, but what is going on with you RIGHT NOW that is making you feel that way?”

You’re never going to get justification. Or, you might, but that isn’t the purpose. The true narcissist can control their behavior. That’s what is most cruel about them. They know what they are doing. By investing minimal creativity into asking justification in different ways, the cognitive effort your problem person expends is exponentially greater. Don’t get caught up demanding explanations. Don’t even consider the explanation you do get to be truthful. Just ask for it.

Combine Tactics FTW

Don’t go through a lot of effort. Use these tactics to free up your efforts to your own endeavors.

The shorter, the better. Try throwing all three tactics into one text message. “Hey, the ladies from church are concerned you’re going to try to lord over the next event. What do you think a good game plan is?”

Deploy and forget is a good guiding principle.

THE TRAP IS SET. Wait for the work around.

If you have stuck to the rules and used the three tactics, it is a no win scenario for your problem person. They are either going to hit the pause button on their behavior or they are going to freak out. A lot of times, it only takes one public freak out to get immediate reprieve. While they are nursing their wounds and trying to find a work around, you can rest easy knowing that the three tactics are easy to come up with in the moment and you won’t have to stress about what comes next because you already know how to deal with it.

In the meantime, don't engage. The next work around will make itself known and you can chuckle to yourself at how much less energy you are spending on this stuff and how much extra energy they are spending.

They will spring the trap again and again because the true narcissist is unable to avoid it. The reason they can’t avoid it isn’t obvious to you because you are a normal person who doesn’t understand their mindset. It is good and normal if you don’t understand why these rules and tactics work so well. But, when you start to use them, you will see that they work instantly, even though the long term application is what is going to give you the relief you need.

Good luck.

# Neutralizing the Poison True narcissists are easy to deal with because they have a blind spot in their thinking and only a handful of tools they use. When you are their target, it doesn’t seem easy, but that is only because you have fallen into an unfortunate pattern of behavior. There are a set of rules and tactics you can implement that will gradually rob them of their ability to harm you. You can neutralize their ability to spread poison and you can even turn them to your own agenda without them knowing about it. # Rule No. 1: The first rule in dealing with a true narcissist is implementing no contact as soon as possible. They are capable of causing harm and you should protect yourself from that harm. You have a right to seek safety and protection. Also, have a “go bag” stashed somewhere with a set of keys, cash enough for a hotel room, a few changes of clothes and a smart phone or tablet that has a texting app that works through WiFi. Being able to walk away from a face to face confrontation is power. The rest of this is for people who, for whatever reason, are unable to go no contact. Those of us who are trapped there know what that is like. These rules and tactics also apply to people who engage in standard narcissistic behavior, but a normal person’s ability to be reasonable and make compromises and amends means you shouldn’t really have to be hardcore about it. # Rule No. 2: Never, ever, ever mention the word narcissist. You will polarize this person in a way that will be difficult to return from. If you have done this, already, just let it fade into memory. Also, don’t use "gaslight", “triangulate”, “love bomb” or anything else that might lead back to literature that discusses narcissists. # Rule No. 3: Never, ever, ever try to convince the narcissist they are a narcissist. In fact, the best diagnosis for them is Borderline Personality Disorder, so that they can be convinced to go through cognitive behavioral therapy. You will usually not convince a true narcissist that they are a narcissist. If they become convinced, it will be because you have utilized these rules and tactics against them so well. # Rule No. 4: Be polite. Politeness is its own reward and it is your best weapon. The longer you are steadfastly polite, the more a person’s negative overtones become obvious to themselves and the people around them. Never give the appearance of being the hostile party. # Rule No. 4: Ban sarcasm. This is more difficult than I thought it would be, but it comes naturally, now. Sarcasm is just going to be used against you and make you look like the jerk. Especially in writing. If something can be read either way, specify that it is an honest question. # Rule No 5: Ban secret conversations. If you are texting, always make sure someone else is in the thread with you. No one on one texting. No coordinating against people in secret and don’t even allow yourself to be in a position where you give the impression you are coordinating with anyone. From now on, you don’t say anything about anyone that you wouldn’t tell them in person. Once you have lived with that, for a bit, then you can start telling people that you don’t participate in secret conversations to coordinate against anyone or put yourself in the position where that might be the case. You can use “court safe”, religion, “my therapy” as a reason, or even not bother to offer an explanation. “As a general rule of thumb, I have banned having secret conversation froms my life.” Once your problem person is aware of this rule, it will put them on the run, because they are going to go immediately have a secret conversation about it. # Rule No. 6: Keep everything “court safe.” This means that you should expect a judge to look over every email and text message and have secretly recorded conversations. An imaginary judge. This judge is looking for the hostile party. You are allowed to be angry. You are allowed to have your feelings and act upon those feelings. Just don’t show those feelings to anyone who isn’t safe or anyone who doesn’t understand how and why you have to protect yourself. As far as real recordings, I recommend hunting cameras that are triggered by motion activation and always having a device around, like a smart phone, that is capable of taking pictures, recording sound and recording video. Know your local laws about recording people. Now that you know the ground rules, here are your three tactics that you should employ in every exchange: # Tactic No. 1: Telegraph the behavior. You can often predict the problem person’s behavior. Simply by telling them you are concerned they are about to commit that behavior creates a trap for them. You’ll get better at predicting when you practice, but with no alternative you can also just explain past behavior in general terms, so that it doesn’t repeat. Generally, don’t use any jargon. Keep it simple. “I’m afraid you are using your inheritance as a carrot to make me do things that I don’t want to do.” “I’m concerned you are having secret conversations that are being used to undermine me.” “Is there a chance you are going to play the victim card if I spell out some of your hurtful behavior?” # Tactic No. 2: Reverse Triangulate This merely means you bring as many sets of eyes in against your problem person as possible. This simply means telling your problem person’s “flying monkeys” or “harem” about the behavior without using jargon before the behavior happens so that the credibility of the rumors against you begin to slowly deteriorate. By including people in the conversations and always being consistently polite, non sarcastic and “above” secret conversations, the extra set of eyes force a person to censor themselves. You can even use imaginary eyes like your “journal” or a psychiatrist that doesn’t exist. (I have a fake psychiatrist, btw, that I use. This psychiatrist believes in, first, controlling your own reactions to bad behavior and then using truth, honesty and positivity to counteract dishonesty and negativity.) If you are caught in conversation, often use “Person A says...” and “Person B thinks...” where the problem person is now forced to go through the extra cognitive effort to work around these other people’s points of view. It also allows you not to attach yourself to good ideas so that they will be discredited. Bonus points if you can attach a person you don’t like to an idea you do like while hinting you don’t like the idea. # Tactic No. 3: Seek justification. Just make this a habit. “I’m confused, can you explain that?” “I understand you are upset, but I don’t understand why?” When ancient history gets drudged up, use, “I know, that was a long time ago, but what is going on with you RIGHT NOW that is making you feel that way?” You’re never going to get justification. Or, you might, but that isn’t the purpose. The true narcissist can control their behavior. That’s what is most cruel about them. They know what they are doing. By investing minimal creativity into asking justification in different ways, the cognitive effort your problem person expends is exponentially greater. Don’t get caught up demanding explanations. Don’t even consider the explanation you do get to be truthful. Just ask for it. # Combine Tactics FTW Don’t go through a lot of effort. Use these tactics to free up your efforts to your own endeavors. The shorter, the better. Try throwing all three tactics into one text message. “Hey, the ladies from church are concerned you’re going to try to lord over the next event. What do you think a good game plan is?” Deploy and forget is a good guiding principle. # THE TRAP IS SET. Wait for the work around. If you have stuck to the rules and used the three tactics, it is a no win scenario for your problem person. They are either going to hit the pause button on their behavior or they are going to freak out. A lot of times, it only takes one public freak out to get immediate reprieve. While they are nursing their wounds and trying to find a work around, you can rest easy knowing that the three tactics are easy to come up with in the moment and you won’t have to stress about what comes next because you already know how to deal with it. In the meantime, don't engage. The next work around will make itself known and you can chuckle to yourself at how much less energy you are spending on this stuff and how much extra energy they are spending. They will spring the trap again and again because the true narcissist is unable to avoid it. The reason they can’t avoid it isn’t obvious to you because you are a normal person who doesn’t understand their mindset. It is good and normal if you don’t understand why these rules and tactics work so well. But, when you start to use them, you will see that they work instantly, even though the long term application is what is going to give you the relief you need. Good luck.

[–] • 0 pt

Narcissists utilize flying monkeys. This is the primary starting point of gangstalking, which exists on a spectrum. If the person you are dealing with does not have flying monkeys, they are, most likely, not a narcissist.

The flying monkeys are just as much of a threat.

Sarcasm shouldn't be used for a variety of reasons. One, it is the most basic form of black magic double speak. It's fine for your bros, but the same reasons you should over use "curse" words applies. Beyond that, you can tank a whole court case using a single sarcastic comment. Mediators will use it to crucify you.

The reason you "muh j00s" retards will never get anywhere is because you will never successfully create a convincing argument using "Jews." You will, however, have plenty of luck outlining "the behavior" and explaining it terms of abusive narcissism.

If you walk into court and argue using "muh J00s" you are officially going to be painted as the village idiot. It is a thought terminating neurolinguistic programming trick.

It's actually not "muh J00s", btw, as Khazarian RussoTurks aren't actually Jewish; they just created the World Jewish Congress to collect tribute from the Jewish population like the industrial scale child molestors at the Vatican.

The very top of the pyramid are Wahhabists, Jesuits and Zionists and they are under a single umbrella.

So, yeah... your "muh J00s" argument is never, ever, ever, ever going to work.

As t the rest, it's clear you haven't been targeted in your life. Sure, you may have brushed up against plenty of narcissists and had conflicts with them. But, you've never been locked in a struggle where one decides they need to see you in a constant state of suffering or dead.