I am pondering my fate and who should benefit from it. Soliciting input ...

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Morbid shit you have to think about when you get older ... sorry to post this but I could use some unbiased ideas from people outside of my circle of friends and family.

I have a kind of perplexing personal situation that I am trying to figure out.

I am currently single. I have no children. My parents have passed on. I have no siblings. I was the only son of an only son of an only son. I'm getting up in years, still think and feel like a 40 something but more mellow with age. I have no medical issues, should live at least another 10-20 years but you never know. I've married and divorced, have had some wonderful times during a few LTRs with a handful of quality women in my life. It is highly possible I will never marry again. The women I'm attracting lately aren't getting any cuter or striking me like a thunderbolt.

I am the end of my father's lineage and only have relatives on my Mom's side. Most cousins on Mom's side have had 2 or more kids. I have not spent much time with my cousins other than weddings and funerals over the past 40 years. They live hours away from me. I am younger than all but one cousin, theoretically most of them will die before me.

My problem is who am I going leave my estate to? It is fairly sizeable and I don't see myself spending it all before my time comes. I've always been a frugal Yankee, it was how I was raised. It would be going against my nature to try to spend most of it before I fade into history, I don't think I would find spending it all that enjoyable.

My mom's side of the family is not wealthy, my estate divided up and distributed among them would change lives ... for the better I would hope.

My thought was to generally have my estate liquidated and divided among my surviving cousins. However, they are almost all older than me and may not be around or physically/mentally able to manage/liquidate my estate when my departure time comes.

My next thought was to skip that generation and focus on their surviving children (most in their 40's now), of which I have no real personal relationships and barely know their names. I could spend time trying to get to know them better in the time I have left and single out those who I think would most appreciate some of my family artifacts to keep them in their family, to be handed down again and again over time, as well as dividing the rest of my estate among all of them. As an example, I want my guns, my fathers guns, my grandfather's guns to be valued and handed down through future generations of mom's family. My cousins are/were all hunters and have passed the tradition onto their kids who would likely value the guns vs head for the pawn shop.

There is a hybrid solution, beneficiaries could be my surviving cousins and the children of my deceased cousins at that time.

I intend to leave all of my motorized toys - atvs, snowmobiles, cars, trucks to my lifelong buddy who was the best man at my wedding and has had a big impact on my life for over 50 years. He would know what to do with those toys (he is a master mechanic savvy in all motorsports) whereas I don't know about my cousins and their kids.

Can anyone think of other options I might consider beyond liquidating it all to fund sending my corpse to Mars? Lol!

I feel I need to settle on a solid plan before discussing any of this with my cousins. Maybe someone on POAL has an idea I haven't considered. AOU might suggest I make POAL the beneficiary so he can upgrade the server, then retire. Lol! Just kidding!

Morbid shit you have to think about when you get older ... sorry to post this but I could use some unbiased ideas from people outside of my circle of friends and family. I have a kind of perplexing personal situation that I am trying to figure out. I am currently single. I have no children. My parents have passed on. I have no siblings. I was the only son of an only son of an only son. I'm getting up in years, still think and feel like a 40 something but more mellow with age. I have no medical issues, should live at least another 10-20 years but you never know. I've married and divorced, have had some wonderful times during a few LTRs with a handful of quality women in my life. It is highly possible I will never marry again. The women I'm attracting lately aren't getting any cuter or striking me like a thunderbolt. I am the end of my father's lineage and only have relatives on my Mom's side. Most cousins on Mom's side have had 2 or more kids. I have not spent much time with my cousins other than weddings and funerals over the past 40 years. They live hours away from me. I am younger than all but one cousin, theoretically most of them will die before me. My problem is who am I going leave my estate to? It is fairly sizeable and I don't see myself spending it all before my time comes. I've always been a frugal Yankee, it was how I was raised. It would be going against my nature to try to spend most of it before I fade into history, I don't think I would find spending it all that enjoyable. My mom's side of the family is not wealthy, my estate divided up and distributed among them would change lives ... for the better I would hope. My thought was to generally have my estate liquidated and divided among my surviving cousins. However, they are almost all older than me and may not be around or physically/mentally able to manage/liquidate my estate when my departure time comes. My next thought was to skip that generation and focus on their surviving children (most in their 40's now), of which I have no real personal relationships and barely know their names. I could spend time trying to get to know them better in the time I have left and single out those who I think would most appreciate some of my family artifacts to keep them in their family, to be handed down again and again over time, as well as dividing the rest of my estate among all of them. As an example, I want my guns, my fathers guns, my grandfather's guns to be valued and handed down through future generations of mom's family. My cousins are/were all hunters and have passed the tradition onto their kids who would likely value the guns vs head for the pawn shop. There is a hybrid solution, beneficiaries could be my surviving cousins and the children of my deceased cousins at that time. I intend to leave all of my motorized toys - atvs, snowmobiles, cars, trucks to my lifelong buddy who was the best man at my wedding and has had a big impact on my life for over 50 years. He would know what to do with those toys (he is a master mechanic savvy in all motorsports) whereas I don't know about my cousins and their kids. Can anyone think of other options I might consider beyond liquidating it all to fund sending my corpse to Mars? Lol! I feel I need to settle on a solid plan before discussing any of this with my cousins. Maybe someone on POAL has an idea I haven't considered. AOU might suggest I make POAL the beneficiary so he can upgrade the server, then retire. Lol! Just kidding!

[–] • 2 pts

Do everything on your bucket list , and put it in a trust naming the beneficiary is the first one of the little cousins to pay taxes on $150k/ yr, because you know they won't piss it away on drugs. It will motivate them.

[–] • 0 pt

My bucket list is pretty much checked off at this point. I had a decent childhood though my folks started with nothing, I had a challenging CS/EE career in the semiconductor industry ... virtually was my dream job occasionally tainted only by management, a hugely successful passive second career (land development) that allowed me to quit working my first career when I was 45 and only then to make my real wealth. I essentially retired at 45. I have been blessed in those areas. I've travelled and seen much of the USA, Maui and Hawaii, some of Asia. Cruised the Caribbean and visited most countries there, lots of time spent in the deep Maine woods and Appalachian mountains. To be honest, I don't have much of a bucket list anymore. I've been an adrenaline junkie in motorsports during my best years (the stories I could tell!), mastered dry fly fishing, deadly accurate with a shotgun, rifle or pistol (all Thanks to my Dad!). I have nothing to complain about if I drop dead tomorrow. I guess a big item on my bucket list is to clean up and weed out my stuff so whomever I select to take my estate to probate will have less clutter and confusion to deal with. Finding a fine woman to share the years I have ahead of me would be fabulous. Finding a woman ~25 years younger than me to have a child with would be very tempting, but it would be like having grandpa or great grandpa for a father, I would not be able to teach/do all the things with him that a younger father could and I would probably be dead before the kid turned 20. So I don't think doing that would be fair to my child. In the meantime the mother might piss away his inheritance.

My bucket list is pretty empty. Organizing my future graceful exit is now as important to me as anything that remains on my bucket list.

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