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Morbid shit you have to think about when you get older ... sorry to post this but I could use some unbiased ideas from people outside of my circle of friends and family.

I have a kind of perplexing personal situation that I am trying to figure out.

I am currently single. I have no children. My parents have passed on. I have no siblings. I was the only son of an only son of an only son. I'm getting up in years, still think and feel like a 40 something but more mellow with age. I have no medical issues, should live at least another 10-20 years but you never know. I've married and divorced, have had some wonderful times during a few LTRs with a handful of quality women in my life. It is highly possible I will never marry again. The women I'm attracting lately aren't getting any cuter or striking me like a thunderbolt.

I am the end of my father's lineage and only have relatives on my Mom's side. Most cousins on Mom's side have had 2 or more kids. I have not spent much time with my cousins other than weddings and funerals over the past 40 years. They live hours away from me. I am younger than all but one cousin, theoretically most of them will die before me.

My problem is who am I going leave my estate to? It is fairly sizeable and I don't see myself spending it all before my time comes. I've always been a frugal Yankee, it was how I was raised. It would be going against my nature to try to spend most of it before I fade into history, I don't think I would find spending it all that enjoyable.

My mom's side of the family is not wealthy, my estate divided up and distributed among them would change lives ... for the better I would hope.

My thought was to generally have my estate liquidated and divided among my surviving cousins. However, they are almost all older than me and may not be around or physically/mentally able to manage/liquidate my estate when my departure time comes.

My next thought was to skip that generation and focus on their surviving children (most in their 40's now), of which I have no real personal relationships and barely know their names. I could spend time trying to get to know them better in the time I have left and single out those who I think would most appreciate some of my family artifacts to keep them in their family, to be handed down again and again over time, as well as dividing the rest of my estate among all of them. As an example, I want my guns, my fathers guns, my grandfather's guns to be valued and handed down through future generations of mom's family. My cousins are/were all hunters and have passed the tradition onto their kids who would likely value the guns vs head for the pawn shop.

There is a hybrid solution, beneficiaries could be my surviving cousins and the children of my deceased cousins at that time.

I intend to leave all of my motorized toys - atvs, snowmobiles, cars, trucks to my lifelong buddy who was the best man at my wedding and has had a big impact on my life for over 50 years. He would know what to do with those toys (he is a master mechanic savvy in all motorsports) whereas I don't know about my cousins and their kids.

Can anyone think of other options I might consider beyond liquidating it all to fund sending my corpse to Mars? Lol!

I feel I need to settle on a solid plan before discussing any of this with my cousins. Maybe someone on POAL has an idea I haven't considered. AOU might suggest I make POAL the beneficiary so he can upgrade the server, then retire. Lol! Just kidding!

Morbid shit you have to think about when you get older ... sorry to post this but I could use some unbiased ideas from people outside of my circle of friends and family. I have a kind of perplexing personal situation that I am trying to figure out. I am currently single. I have no children. My parents have passed on. I have no siblings. I was the only son of an only son of an only son. I'm getting up in years, still think and feel like a 40 something but more mellow with age. I have no medical issues, should live at least another 10-20 years but you never know. I've married and divorced, have had some wonderful times during a few LTRs with a handful of quality women in my life. It is highly possible I will never marry again. The women I'm attracting lately aren't getting any cuter or striking me like a thunderbolt. I am the end of my father's lineage and only have relatives on my Mom's side. Most cousins on Mom's side have had 2 or more kids. I have not spent much time with my cousins other than weddings and funerals over the past 40 years. They live hours away from me. I am younger than all but one cousin, theoretically most of them will die before me. My problem is who am I going leave my estate to? It is fairly sizeable and I don't see myself spending it all before my time comes. I've always been a frugal Yankee, it was how I was raised. It would be going against my nature to try to spend most of it before I fade into history, I don't think I would find spending it all that enjoyable. My mom's side of the family is not wealthy, my estate divided up and distributed among them would change lives ... for the better I would hope. My thought was to generally have my estate liquidated and divided among my surviving cousins. However, they are almost all older than me and may not be around or physically/mentally able to manage/liquidate my estate when my departure time comes. My next thought was to skip that generation and focus on their surviving children (most in their 40's now), of which I have no real personal relationships and barely know their names. I could spend time trying to get to know them better in the time I have left and single out those who I think would most appreciate some of my family artifacts to keep them in their family, to be handed down again and again over time, as well as dividing the rest of my estate among all of them. As an example, I want my guns, my fathers guns, my grandfather's guns to be valued and handed down through future generations of mom's family. My cousins are/were all hunters and have passed the tradition onto their kids who would likely value the guns vs head for the pawn shop. There is a hybrid solution, beneficiaries could be my surviving cousins and the children of my deceased cousins at that time. I intend to leave all of my motorized toys - atvs, snowmobiles, cars, trucks to my lifelong buddy who was the best man at my wedding and has had a big impact on my life for over 50 years. He would know what to do with those toys (he is a master mechanic savvy in all motorsports) whereas I don't know about my cousins and their kids. Can anyone think of other options I might consider beyond liquidating it all to fund sending my corpse to Mars? Lol! I feel I need to settle on a solid plan before discussing any of this with my cousins. Maybe someone on POAL has an idea I haven't considered. AOU might suggest I make POAL the beneficiary so he can upgrade the server, then retire. Lol! Just kidding!

(post is archived)

[–] 1 pt

Thanks Fumduck, wise advice, read your PM a minute ago too.

Yes, I don't bother with new furniture anymore, I know most of what I have will go to the dump after I am gone. I have foam sticking out of my wing back sofa but I don't care anymore, I don't entertain anyone here so there is no one to really care. My books, neat old woodworking passed down from my grandfather, tables, chairs, etc will be barn sales or trashed. After my mom passed away I started sorting through her house to reduce the clutter, got rid of a lot of things from 3 generations of families in order to make room for my stuff before I sold my house and moved back to the family homestead.

As far as my assets, I have cash, real estate, gold bullion and the junk in/at the house. I'm working towards another round of clutter reduction and see it as an ongoing process. I'm too sentimental and if there is a family memory attached to it, I have a very hard time letting go of it. I miss my family and being all alone now, these items give me comfort and trigger good memories of the past.

Real estate wise I hope to liquidate my land holdings and business in the next real estate cycle. I have a camp in the western mountains of Maine that my Dad and I built in 1977. So many good times up there over the years. Someday I'll have to let it go. With luck all that will be done before it is my time to go. I hope to leave cash, bullion, my folks house and the minimized crap that remains for the executor of my will.