As a reply let me ask you the following: What does an apple taste like? If you've never been in the grips of an addiction then you probably aren't going to get any better appreciation of what it's like beyond that of an observer. I get that you really really want to have a better understanding of what it's like, but you'll have to take my word for it that even if you could it won't help dealing with an addict in the least, assuming that's your end game here. Addicts lie and cheat, and will deceive you in ways you will not see coming. They are not themselves any more, rather they are beings that live to serve their master, ie. the addiction. 'Course there are many degrees to this and you'll range from "gee I could hardly tell he's an addict" to those poor souls who literally lose their lives to chasing the high. In the greater scheme of things I actually feel that I personally have gotten off lightly. There's been so much research done on addiction but there's really hasn't been much by way of useful results. Suffice to say that the most important thing you can do is protect yourself and your loved ones first, and then do what you can to help the addict in your life. What can I say beyond that I really enjoy the buzz that alcohol brings me. I'm an introvert but I'm not one of those that drinking brings out of their shell, so that's not a reason that I drink. In fact I prefer to drink alone, period. I don't enjoy the dull head and all the rest the next day, but not enough to keep me from drinking. I wish that I had a lesson here for you to learn there's no lesson; it's just humanity.