I come from a horribly toxic and abusive family, my brother and i still have horror stories of the carnage, and the severity of the damage was so great, the family and extended family is permanently split apart ... all thanks to my mom. she never celebrated birthdays, and every "gift" she would give us was usually laced with hundreds of commands, demands, intonations, and who even knows. it was never just a gift, it was a "poor me, after everything ive done" type of shenanigans. coming to my gf, my brain has a very hard time adapting to true authenticity and love. not that it can't be done, it definitely can, but my brain ha a very hard time understanding why someone would want to be genuinely nice because they truly love me. she got me these great gifts for an event, and my brain could not mentally process why she would give me gifts and a card, and didn't want anything back for them. it almost short circuited my brain into a depression.