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I have to sell something, well maybe and what I want to know is is there a way to make sure the cash I'm getting isn't counterfeit? Do those pens work or is that just a chump's way of checking 20s 50s hundred dollar bills?

I have to sell something, well maybe and what I want to know is is there a way to make sure the cash I'm getting isn't counterfeit? Do those pens work or is that just a chump's way of checking 20s 50s hundred dollar bills?

(post is archived)

[–] • 18 pts

Check the color of the person trying to use it

[–] • 3 pts

Yes of course. A nig I wouldn't even respond. The same for a spic. I'm selling a solar panel, the guys trying to joo me. I want at least $50 more than he's offering. But I'm going to ask for a hundred more so I have room to negotiate. I can't wait for him to show up with even less money and try to nig me like that.

[–] • 1 pt

Well, definitely check the watermark, and make sure the watermark is the same president that is on the bill. I've seen 5s that they bleached out and reprinted before. Make sure it feels right, and trust your gut.

How's selling solar? I've always wondered about that

[–] • 2 pts

Congrats ! You win the Internet today !

[–] • 1 pt

My take at the joke delivery:

A flashlight. Shine it on the surface. If it's dark, the bills are counterfeit and leave immediately. If it's light, then shine the light on the bills and check for the embedded strip.

[–] • 1 pt

I was thinking about the joke after i wrote it, and if I was gonna write it again, I would say.

check the color of the person trying to use it. They should be a nice, crisp, clean white. If you notice any discoloration, it looks brown, dark, or swarthy, the bill is suspect and you should not accept.

[–] • 1 pt

My amateur comedian sense is that it should sound like you're examining the bill until the end when you realize it was about the skin of the buyer.

[–] • 4 pts (edited )

Hold the bill up to the light and check the strip, it'll say what denomination it's for. There's also a watermark of the presidents head visible when held up to the light. Check the ink in the corners noting the denomination to see if it has metallic flakes in it and finally look for the red and blue fibers throughout the bill.

[–] • 1 pt

I know people that have pulled those out.

[–] • 0 pt

They'll still have the watermark and metallicized ink to contend with assuming they bleach a lower denomination bill while retaining the security fibers.

[–] • 4 pts

It's all.fake

[–] • 0 pt

Well true. but we use the fakeness so we don't have to mow someone's grass for a loaf of bread.

[–] • 0 pt

That's why I'm always on the other side of the transaction, getting rid of my funny money for real money that has weight in the hand.

[–] • 4 pts

The pens just look for starches in the paper used. Wood fiber paper has a lot of starches that cotton rag doesn't, the ink darkens if starch is present.

A good counterfeit will be printed on the right paper, but it's unlikely that nigger is going to have a good counterfeit.

[–] • 1 pt

Combination. Defense in depth. I'd use the pen and UV light. The bills also have ink whose patterns you can feel. Having a legit bill on hand is good for comparison.

[–] • 0 pt

TIL

[–] • 0 pt

Supposedly, bills made before 1960 don't work with these pens.

[–] • 2 pts

A jew

[–] • 1 pt

Go down to the local joo temple and ask them to sniff the bills.

[–] • 2 pts

I remember going with my buddy to buy a GPU from a guy who turned out to be a jew. He pulled out a phone, spent like 10 minutes trying to get a good shot, and then another ten looking at the lines or some shit on the bill, before going on a rant about how it works and what he's looking for. Me and my buddy were laughing all the way back home making fun of that silly kike.

[–] • 2 pts

Have him meet you in a casino and pay you in chips. Then cash out.

[–] • 0 pt

The closest casino is 3 hrs away.

[–] • 1 pt

Then meet him at an ATM and watch the money come out.

[–] • 0 pt

That's a good idea and a safe one too. The only thing is then they might have a tactical advantage being close to an escape route. The dudes that's interested isn't a nigger but is pseudo pushy trying to dictate the haggle. I almost don't want to do the deal because the solar panels are really good and if I'm not using them now it doesn't mean I couldn't use them later. And they're good for about 10 years and that's with being in the elements from what I understand.

[–] • 1 pt

Is easy af to spot a fake of you've ever used American money

[–] • 0 pt

I really don't use high value bills at all. I always pay with a credit card.

[–] • 1 pt

Avoid them entirely and just barter using chickens.

[–] • 1 pt

You know I actually bailed on the guy because the initial offer was for a price that was way too low. And I didn't feel like wasting my time trying to justify the price that I asked.